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If that’s the case, please scroll down like 2 inches (that’s what she said) and get those words off your screen. Other titles include: “Dear Eharmony, because of you I’m going to have to reproduce through mitosis” “Dear Eharmony, I just bought the domain name Fuck Eharmony.com, no seriously, I did”| “Dear Eharmony, you took my money, dignity, and self respect, and all I got was this lousy blog” It’s true, I actually did buy the domain name So the purpose, the essence, of this blog, is that my eharmony subscription is ending this month. This is my second stint on eharmony.com, this last stint I signed up for 6 months. At first it’s awesome you have matches sent to you, which you review and if you like you can proceed to step 1, which is you send them multiple choice questions.

That’s always kind of awkward when you’re supposed to be “working”. You’re going to continue reading without telling any of your hot female co-workers? I had some other titles in work for this blog, but they just didn’t capture the essence of what I was trying to say. A “computer” matches you up based on “29 levels of compatibility”, which I’m fine with. Because you’re thinking, wow some super computer down at Eharmony headquarters is crunching vectors and differential equations just to find my perfect mate, and everyday you log in and see new matches, that you think are hand picked from the computer gods above.

Another thing I don’t like about eharmony is all the fucking ads. Not only are they’re charging me about 30 bucks a month, they also bombard me with ads!?

What the fuck are they doing with all the money I give them each month!?

There’s no way that 748 girls just haven’t responded back to you.

They’re probably closed you out and you didn’t know. I WISH they had closed me out, that way at least I know they’re weren’t interested, they would be removed from my list.

Or maybe that’s why girls don’t respond back to me?

Because I know about cumulative binomial probability. I actually posted this question to eharmony on their facebook wall. I have no idea why my matches don’t just close out the match if they’re not interested.I expect ads on a free site, but not one where I’m paying!? Apparently, it’s a good thing my subscription is ending. I know legally they CAN cancel my account at any time for any reason, but SHOULD they cancel my account just because I blogged about my experience in a negative way. I think I’ve run out of girls in San Diego to be matched with. I got an email saying my last month was refunded and when I tried to log in it said: Say whaaaaaaaaaa. So before you know it, you’re waiting on 5 girls to respond back, and then it’s 10, then 20, then 50! As of tonight I was in stage 1, waiting for 748 matches to respond back to me from stage 1. You’re probably thinking Steven, you should be more selective anyways, you can’t just be communicating with every person you get matched with. So all together I have been matched with 1905 and different females. Or whats more likely is you sent me every girl in San Diego in 7 girl increments.I know right, how ridiculous is it to be “communicating” with 50 different girls all at the same time, all waiting for them to respond. What’s most upsetting about this shenanigans is that I am waiting for 748 girls to get back to me, with stage 1 questions.So you send over your questions for stage 1 of 4 and then you have to wait for them to respond. But it’s fine, you don’t really care that this person hasn’t responded in a day or two because each day you get a new batch of matches hand picked by these computer gods as people that match you on 29 levels of compatibility.

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